The last (and only time) Lorne Hiltser and I spent the night together was when he took me to Cedar's Sinai a few months ago. I was in so much pain, I actually thought I might die. He was calm and respectful while undressing me and getting me into the undignified backless gown in the hospital's unflattering light, and stayed with me through the night as I screamed in pain.
As the morphine kicked in, and it became clear I wasn't going to die, I started to feel better and we managed to have some fun. Egged on by a heavily drugged Marika, Lorne attempted to steal medical supplies and was caught by a nurse who quickly locked up the cabinets. We did manage to get out with some rubber gloves and lube in the end.
It turns out that Lorne isn't just a swift undresser and a great prom date (Number 7: Go to Prom) but a trapeze artist who recently worked at the LA County Fair, in the Trapeze Booth. And, yes, I believe that puts him in the "carnie" category. On a beautiful Sunday morning, we headed to Hollywood Aerial Arts for a lesson in Flying Trapeze.
Even though I've bungee jumped and most recently gone skydiving, I'm really afraid of heights. I'm not comfortable being high up, probably because I can't stop my brain from playing out the "falling scenario" over and over and over.
There were a couple of quick rules and prep exercises and then I got up, eager to go first because I thought I might get more scared watching other people do it before me. I chalked up my hands, trying to look as nonchalantly cool and calm as possible, then climbed up the ladder.
The higher I climbed, the more tense I got, so I had to remind myself to breathe once I got to the top. I said it to George (who was up there giving me the send-off) every time; "I'm just going to breathe..." and he smiled. Sometimes Lorne was up there giving me the send-off, although I must say it was harder to trust that he wasn't going to drop me. Most likely on account of his shifty mustache.
The scariest part to me was standing up there, once I was in the air I was completely fine. After a couple of "easy" jumps, just falling on my back, I realized the key to being a good trapeze artist is to listen and follow the instructions. It sounds simple, but of course it isn't. Because everything you do up there is counter intuitive to what your brain wants you to do. Basically, you're having an argument with your brain about what to do next, instead of just hop when Ray yells "hop," and let go when he yells "let go." Letting go is not easy at all, in trapezing or in life.
In the midst of a perfect back flip
I decided to give the whole "following the instructions" a shot after a couple of runs of doing my own thing and being only moderately successful. What happens when you listen to Ray, do exactly what he says, when he says to do it, is quite extraordinary. I listened to the cue, hopped, got my legs up, let my arms hang, brought my arms back, swung my legs back and forth, before landing in a back flip. Everything was fluid and easy. My body went where it was supposed to go, while my mind was still. I felt at peace and totally free at the same time. Imagine that.
Nick, waiting to catch a flying Swede
I couldn't wait to do it again. So, next up, I did the same thing agin but when I hung upside down, I stretched my arms out and Nick magically caught me. Which was even more AWESOME! I felt like I was in the circus, only without the glitter costume. Nick did wear sparkly suspenders, so it was easy to close my eyes and imagine the brightly colored tent, the smell of elephant poop, little people roaming around in funny costumes, and then...the spot light comes on, and I'm flying though the air in a red sequined number, to loud cheers and wild applause.
I could have stayed all day. Really. Flying trapeze is cool and a total adrenaline kick. My hands got a bit sore and callused but I didn't mind because I was deliriously happy and cannot wait to go back.
Thank you Lorne for sharing one of your passions with me, and thanks to Ray, Nick and George for keeping me safe. And now, ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in Forty By Forty history, the video!
This has been my favorite one so far. AMAZING!
Posted by: hollywood housewife | 10/25/2010 at 09:50 AM